Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Outlet

It's been a while... too long in fact and although I'd like to say I still think about blogging every day, I wouldn't be telling the truth. Life has become too busy and chaotic. But when I do think of it, I remember what fun it is to share my thoughts and dreams or to just attempt to make someone smile.

I will share more about the craziness that has ensued shortly... like within the month. And hopefully I will be back to post a little more regularly but for today I just need to use this as an outlet.

Last night I had one of those dreams... Those heart wrenching horrible, scary dreams that linger. When you wake up it feels real and its nearly impossible to shake. I wish I could make it go away right now although I know eventually it will.

My father, although a great man, is far from perfect and he's having a rough time right now. It affects the family more than he realizes, even from far away. But to dream that he passed on is too much for me to handle right now. There is too much unforgiveness and uncertainty surrounding him. I was hysterical in my dream and I awoke to feeling like I balled my eyes out all night. Hopefully this will soon go away but in the mean time, I'm debating on whether or not I should have a good talk with him...

1 comment:

Pamela said...

If you're thinking about it? Maybe you should. I think it would be worse to regret not saying what's on your heart for the rest of your life than to piss him off now.

But that's just me.